Mercury retrograde – the visitor no one asked for, but everyone has to deal with

Note: this article is an updated version of a previous post.

Mercury retrograde is basically like that time you looked after your cousin’s new puppy and he ran amok, eating your favourite shoes and crapping all over your house. It begins this weekend, and runs until December 22. You have been warned.

The planet Mercury is associated with communication, short-distance travel, technology, contracts, postage, intellect and friends, and when it goes retrograde – which happens three times a year, lasting a couple of weeks each time – the world basically goes bananas. Computers go haywire, traffic becomes even worse, buses get massively delayed for no apparent reason and conflicts pop up as a result of thoughtless words or a miscommunication. Sounds like a plot from a Harry Potter movie, I know, but I’m telling you Mercury’s capers can be stranger than fiction. During one Mercury retrograde a few years ago, the power went out across Sydney Airport for almost an entire day, leaving thousands of travellers stranded, hungry and unable to get up-to-date information (yikes). 

A retrograde is what occurs when a planet is passing Earth. Said planet appears to be going backwards (hence ‘retrograde’) as it orbits Earth, but it isn’t really. Although all planets go retrograde on the regular, Mercury is the one that gets the most publicity, because although its retrograde cycle doesn’t last long, it has the most noticeable effect on our everyday lives. Since Mercury affects the postal service, and December is the busiest time of year for postage (Christmas cards and presents), this retrograde could cause a lot of headaches, so I highly recommend doing your Christmas shopping early. 

Look, this all sounds worse than it is. Sure, it’s annoying, inconvenient and potentially costly (I can confirm that my new laptop, which replaced the one that melted down last retrograde, are VERY EXPENSIVE) but Mercury retrograde is not worth freaking out over. The best thing you can do is be prepared – predictions of doom and gloom are not exactly helpful. So back up all your important data, strengthen your passwords, leave home super-early when you’ve got somewhere important to be (like, you know, the airport), avoid signing contracts (or go over the fine print thoroughly before you commit with your signature), carry a magazine to amuse yourself during transport delays, take your car for a tune up and for goodness’ sake reread emails carefully before you hit ‘send’. We can get through this, people!

Image: The planet Mercury and a satellite